Well, it's that time of year. The time when I look back at the previous year and comment on all the crazy shit that has happened to me. I looked back at the blog and I notice how very little I wrote about. I neglected to mention a lot of what went on in the past year that was important, meaningful, and had a huge effect on my life. And I am okay with it. I was busy and I was doing A LOT of growing up as a person. I learned to use the subway, to travel on my own with confidence, met a lot of interesting people, learned to be okay on my own. I am completely (mostly) self sufficient. I can spend time with myself and not feel uncomfortable or like I want to run away from me. I learned I am a kick ass teacher and I actually enjoy it. I learned more about myself in the last year then I did all through high school and college and all that time before.
But I also had a lot of really shitty times this year. Times I would love to go back and and request a do-over on to save myself some pain and heartache. At the same time, I look back at those times and know deep down that, as painful as they were at the time, they were nothing I couldn't handle, and they taught me more then all the good stuff that happened.
I met some cool people I will never forget or stop being friends with, and I also met a lot of people who were completely awful and a waste of my time. The friendships I have formed are some of the most amazing I have had, and the other people I encountered helped me to just say no. I don't need other people around to be happy, especially if those people are making my life miserable with stress and drama and judgements made only because they hate themselves.
Right now, I am sitting in a coffee shop in Seoul drinking coffee and talking to some friends from home. I just went to talk about my new tattoo design with some amazing tattoo artists here, and to put a considerable down-payment on the design. It is going to be absolutely incredible when it is done and will be a representation and a memory of the time I spent here and the many things that have made me stronger. Once it is done I will do a little review of the place. I am getting ready to head back out into the snowy cold to do some late holiday shopping and to just take some time to breathe and continue to be awed by that fact that I am even here. Sometimes in the day-to-day, I loose sight of how crazy it is that I am here, living in South Korea. It all becomes familiar and I forget to be awed and to appreciate how lucky I am to be here and to be able to have this experience. I guess that is the biggest thing that last year has taught me. To stop focusing so heavily on the details and daily bits of my life. All that will work itself out. I have learned to stop and smell the proverbial roses. And after 26 years of always rushing and looking forward to the next thing, the next step, that is a big deal.
Happy Holidays Folks!!!
