Finally, some time to breathe. I have been working straight since my last post, and I finished my online course and all the extras. I am done with remodel at Target and I am working on adjusting to getting up at 3 am so I can be at work by 4:30. I am only scheduled three and a half hours each day, but so far I have worked at least six hours each day. Today I actually worked nine and a half hours.
I also just completed my Summerfest days. It was a good time. Mornings at north gate with Pat and Chris. Nights working Ops with Richard and sometimes Anthony (Pimpy McDigits). That provided hours of entertainment and they were also quality backup, even if they did act like the older brothers I never wanted. I will talk more about Summerfest in a later post but I don't really feel like talking about it right now.
In truth, I don't really know what I want to talk about. I feel like typing and talking but I have no clue what I really want to talk about. I bought a Kindle yesterday and I spent the day downloding the free books from amazon. I also bought a bunch of new clothes and things from Modcloth. But again, I want to talk about each of these things on their own later. I think I am just feeling a bit of a transition pain from being around thousands of people everyday at Summerfest to being around no one all day but myself and my pets. I think I am lonely and that being by myself and working on getting things ready for South Korea is making me nervous and sad. I am starting to get the flighty panic feeling that you get before jumping out of a plane the first time. I know that I will be okay and that the parachute will go off, but I am still terrified that I will be in the small percentage who have there parachutes fail and that I will take a headlong fall to earth. It is as if I am experiencing a low key anxiety attack, or just the beginning of one, all the time.
I am going to spend this weekend getting things organized and trying to feel a bit better about where I am at with Korea and other bits in my life. Saturday I am going to try to make it to the beach for awhile and then I am heading to Dead Man's Carnival, even if I have to go all by myself, I am going. I need to start learning to do things without my friends around, and here is a great time for me to begin.
In truth, I don't really know what I want to talk about. I feel like typing and talking but I have no clue what I really want to talk about. I bought a Kindle yesterday and I spent the day downloding the free books from amazon. I also bought a bunch of new clothes and things from Modcloth. But again, I want to talk about each of these things on their own later. I think I am just feeling a bit of a transition pain from being around thousands of people everyday at Summerfest to being around no one all day but myself and my pets. I think I am lonely and that being by myself and working on getting things ready for South Korea is making me nervous and sad. I am starting to get the flighty panic feeling that you get before jumping out of a plane the first time. I know that I will be okay and that the parachute will go off, but I am still terrified that I will be in the small percentage who have there parachutes fail and that I will take a headlong fall to earth. It is as if I am experiencing a low key anxiety attack, or just the beginning of one, all the time.
I am going to spend this weekend getting things organized and trying to feel a bit better about where I am at with Korea and other bits in my life. Saturday I am going to try to make it to the beach for awhile and then I am heading to Dead Man's Carnival, even if I have to go all by myself, I am going. I need to start learning to do things without my friends around, and here is a great time for me to begin.
